Why would your loved one be difficult?  Why would they sabotage their own best interest?  Why refuse help when the benefits are great?

Sometimes our loved ones do things we don’t understand.  They verbally attack their caregivers. People who are giving their all to help them.  They refuse help that would improve their quality of life. Help that would go a long way to supporting their independence.   

Frequently, difficult or irrational behavior is more than a desire to be difficult.  It’s a manifestation of an underlying issue. They are communicating what they are feeling.  It may be stress, frustration, fear or despair. Try to look for the meaning behind what they are doing.  It may be something simple to decipher or you may need help from a professional who can identify what they’re thinking.

The most important thing, however, is that you don’t take it personally.  Despite how it may appear, it’s almost never an attack on you. It’s usually the result of something internal – a response to a new feeling or challenge.  Uncover what’s causing their behavior and you may find them more willing to accept the help they need to improve their quality of life.